Thursday, October 29, 2020

This is Not What We Planned

 "That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh."  Genesis 2:24  NIV

The first man, Adam, said this when Eve was created.  Husband and wife are to be united; I believe that.  However, the current situation that my husband and I find ourselves in is, in simple terms, ridiculous.  Let me explain...

On Sunday, Oct 12 I returned from a trip to Texas to find that my husband was short of breath, with ankles swelling, high blood pressure, and rapid heart rate.  He still had a bad cough, which he had been battling for at least 2 weeks.  Fast forward to Monday late afternoon and now he is an inpatient in the hospital.  Subsequently he had an echocardiogram, chest x-ray, and angiogram.  No blockages and no apparent causes (much bloodwork done also) for his dilemma, we waited for the diagnosis from a cardiologist.  Drum roll please.......

             DILATED CARDIOMYOPATHY, 20% EJECTION FRACTION

Are you kidding me?? No, wait, that can't be right. I'm the one living with heart failure; it's all about ME, ME, ME! My husband is a 57-year old man who eats right, goes to the gym 3x per week, gardens, landscapes, mows our 5 acres, works inside and outside maintenance and yardwork for a school district, doesn't smoke, doesn't drink anything but fruit juice and water, takes supplements for heart health, and lives squeaky clean. You must have the charts mixed up. But why is he the one laying here in the hospital now? This makes ZERO sense.

So now we wait, on God and the doctor, and more test results. We trust God to work this out for us financially as well. My husband cannot go back to work in his current condition; he can't even drive. Yesterday I was reading a book by Christine Caine called "Undaunted". One thing she said really spoke to me..."although I didn't know what would happen next; I knew it would be OK because God was with me." Oh, what a relief to know this fact of my life. When you find yourself with shocking news, just know that God has already been there and planned for how He will bring you through it. Without my own diagnosis in January, 2011, this current news about my husband might have been terrifying. But we are already armed with some information.

When the news of covid first "hit", I had to work at home from March to May. Everyone in my school district, with the exception of just a handful of people was banned from stepping foot in any of the buildings. It was a scary, frustrating, difficult time. In addition to wondering how this would play out, I just didn't like working from home. As anyone remembers, there was so much confusion. To counteract all this chaos, I would play worship music. It kept my mood elevated and drove out any fear that the enemy would try to bring to my mind. Now I know that in March I was also being prepared for a time in October. These are the two of the songs that I listened to over and over again then and am doing the same thing now.

So when you face your own battles, stay encouraged, friend, because You're gonna be OK .  God's got you in the palm of His hand....you're living in the Goodness of God. It's the best place to be!