2019

2019 – This is the year I grow up.  “When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.”  I Corinthians 13:11 – New Living Translation.  Children are sometimes “punished” when they do something that the parent or other adult authority disagrees with.  The child knows he or she did something “wrong” and would most likely prefer they are allowed to discipline themselves.  But children are children; they don’t think like adults.  In a couple of years, I will be 60 years old, hardly a child.  So this year is going to be the year I “grow up”.  No longer will I “punish” myself for “bad behavior.”  Here’s my recent photo, untouched by photoshop.  Yep, I’ve got a double chin, dark circles, extra skin, etc. etc.  But I am beautiful because I am loved by a Heavenly Father who makes me “enough” and never “too much”.  After a medical emergency last weekend, I am re-evaluating everything in my life.  By God’s grace, never again will I feel inadequate, unloved, or unworthy of love.  I believe what God says about me.  For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior.  He will take delight in you with gladness.  With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.” Zephaniah 3:17  For 2019, I will try to take better care of myself.  I am worth it.  Watching my salt and sugar intake and walking 30 minutes a day is my goal, but I will not beat myself up if I skip a day.  If I want a cookie, I will eat a cookie.  I will not feel obligated to say “yes” to every request made of me.  I will do my very best at my job; it may not live up to someone else’s expectations, but that is OK.  If my place of work can find someone who is smarter and younger than me to take my place, then so be it.  I will no longer worry about it.  I am no longer in competition with anyone, for any reason.  I will continue to love, serve, and grow as I am able.  God cannot be my sufficiency if I am my own source.  It’s beyond my abilities to be all that I “should” be.   "My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.”  2 Corinthians 12:9